Monday, May 31, 2010

Plans change...

At least for us they do - a lot and at the last minute. And, you know, we like to get ourselves into crisis situations like catching trucks on fire going down the interstate (remember that one?) or getting stuck, or having blow-outs. That's what we do! So, we had plans for Kevin to go help John 3:16 Ministries with Unity Fest, and I stay home and get some stuff done and enjoy the place to myself. Simple enough - right? To make a long story short - Kevin headed toward Batesville Friday pulling the fish cooker and made it to Bald Knob (about an hour or so away) and broke down. Driving down the road and Meatzilla just quit. He gets a tow to a garage and spends about 4 hours and almost $500 - to get back on the road...make it to Pleasant Plains (about 15 miles) and breaks down again. Same thing. Towing #2 around midnight now....the men from John 3:16 meet him at Pleasant Plains and pick up the cooker. Kevin heads back with the tow truck and stays in a flea bag hotel until morning. All this drama lasted until about 1:30 in the morning. I was a nervous wreck and he was stressed out!! Next day, garage guy comes and finds an electrical issue and a few other things. Baam...by noon, he is back on the road and makes it to Batesville in time to fry fish for over 4,000 folks! (no charge by the way for the 2nd tow or work on Meatzilla...Amen!) Awesome! AND, the tow truck guy ended up bringing his seven kids to Unity Fest. Pretty cool...huh?
Anyway....Kevin didn't get home until late Saturday night and was worn out. So, we postponed getting the concessions trailer until Tuesday (tomorrow). One plan among many that changed.
Lots going on at the Benson house...some you know all about and some I'll tell you about when I can. But I do ask that when you pray, pray for God to open the doors that He wants us to go through and close the ones He doesn't. We are both pursuing paths that have us praying for His guidance and His will. Some change is inevitable, some change is good, some change is unexpected and some change is just hard. I am not comfortable with change. But with everything else, I find it easier when I seek Him in it.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Going public with it...

I have said for months that the back bedroom has turned into a huge storage closet. It also has a big walk-in closet that is full of junk. Oh, the chore!!! This room is intended to someday house a little Benson bundle of joy. I need to clean it out now while I have energy to tackle it, but I walk in and walk back out because it is too overwhelming. Where to even start? Look at this mess...I am not exaggerating!!! This is my former bill pay closet that everyone made fun of - but I could stack mail in there and it be a mess and just close the door...now my whole house stays a mess, so why contain it to just a closet? ha This is my scrap area and the tubs are where I have attempted to get some stuff out of the closet and into tubs in the attic....
See....this is what it looks like from the hallway looking in...everything is either yard sale, find a new location, throw away or get to the attic. Those are my piles. What a mess! And what do you even do with an old computer? Anybody know? It has sat in the floor since I got my laptop and gave my computer desk to Kevin's office. hmmm?
Ok...maybe between posting this and needing to post an after shot...ha!...plus, my pack with Sandy, I WILL conquer this task!! Baby steps...this weekend I am only tackling the closet!! LOL!

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Smell that?

I wish I had a scratch and sniff screen for ya because it smells like a slice of heaven!!! Boston butts, ribs, pork loin and in a few, some turkey breasts too. YuMMo! Surely, he snuck something on there for me! :-)
Happy Memorial Day Weekend!!! Pics of the concessions trailer coming soon! We pick it up on Sunday! woohoo!!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Missing Jax...

No, the pups haven't been bad or anything...I just miss my boy, Jax. In case you didn't know, he was the greatest dog EVER. He will always be the bestest in my book!

Monday, May 24, 2010

The way to my heart...

...is through my stomach! Kevin has decided to fight the mood swing effects of clomid with feeding me well because a good meal always makes me smile! Good plan honey! Keep it up! Tonight's dinner had his and her plates...HIS: HERS: YUMMO! Still not sure what he did to those potatoes but they were AWESOME!!

Worst Case by James Patterson

**7th book so far this year**
Ok...you all know that James Patterson is my absolute favorite but I thought this book was pretty predictable. Not sure if I am loving the Michael Bennett series. I can't pass up any Alex Cross and Women's Murder Club is a close second. But so far, this Michael Bennett series hasn't won me over. I wouldn't rush out to get this one.

Here's a summary for you though:


Alex Cross has Washington, DC. The Women's Murder Club has San Francisco. Detective Michael Bennett has all of New York City—chaos capital of the world.

Best case: Survival
The son of one of New York's wealthiest families is snatched off the street and held hostage. His parents can't save him, because this kidnapper isn't demanding money. Instead, he quizzes his prisoner on the price others pay for his life of luxury. In this exam, wrong answers are fatal.

Worst case: Death
Detective Michael Bennett leads the investigation. With ten kids of his own, he can't begin to understand what could lead someone to target anyone's children. As another student disappears, another powerful family uses their leverage and connections to turn up the heat on the mayor, the press—anyone who will listen—to stop this killer. Their reach extends all the way to the FBI, which sends its top Abduction Specialist, Agent Emily Parker. Bennett's life—and love life—suddenly get even more complicated.

This case: Detective Michael Bennett is on it
Before Bennett has a chance to protest the FBI's intrusion on his case, the mastermind changes his routine. His plan leads up to the most devastating demonstration yet—one that could bring cataclysmic ruin to every inch of New York City. From the shocking first page to the last exhilarating scene, Worst Case is a nonstop thriller from "America's #1 storyteller" (Forbes).

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Boring is good - right?

Boring IS good! I don't like drama! :) And, right now, there is nothing exciting going on here. We had a slow weekend with concessions, but that's ok. We are still picking up our new trailer next weekend! Woot! My wonderful sister-in-law, Rhonda, covered for me on Saturday, and I stayed home and cleaned house and mowed the yard. It only took 5 hours to clean the house if that tells you HOW messy it was!! Seriously though, clomid was working some of its ugly magic on me Friday and Saturday. I did not need to be running a window on the concessions trailer. I was fine all day Friday, then turned into mean psycho wife (in the midst of our arguing, Kevin told me to stop taking the medicine. heehee!), then I was a crying mess. I went to bed crying and woke up crying. Why? I have no clue. Urgh! I do believe we are going to get pregnant this month and all this will be a distant memory! :-) On a funny note, someone brought a baby to Sunday school today. I was looking at it and commented how tiny it was. Then, I looked at Kevin and he had this look of panic on his face and I quickly assured him I wasn't going to cry. ha! Poor Big Bear...he has no idea what emotion is coming with each moment. Sadly, neither do I! LOL! I have been reminded in the past few weeks what great friends I have and how blessed I am! You know who you are!! Love you!!

Only 9 school days left...then I get a new crop for summer school. I am going to miss this class! Here's to a GREAT week!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Busy, Busy

It has been one of those crazy busy weeks....PTA meetings, retirement parties, caterings, hair appointments, and the weekend brings concessions! LOVE IT! We prayed about the money for this concessions trailer, and God does answer prayers! Kevin has been covered up with work for the past three weeks in a row. We are passing each other coming and going. And, this is the final weekend for sure in the borrowed trailer. Next weekend, we get to pick up OUR new concessions trailer!! Exciting!! And, if this pace keeps up, it will be paid off within a year. Awesomeness! One of the blessings of us only relying solely on my salary to pay our bills for the past year while we get this business going is that we can now spend a year or two using Kevin's money to get us completely out of business and personal debt. I hate debt. And even starting a business, I don't think ours is as bad as some. It's just that I don't like having it at all! So, once we wipe that out, we can start thinking about a move to the country. Another Benson dream! Ahhhh....peaceful!
Everyone enjoy your weekend and if you are local, look for some Memorial Day smoked meats specials from Kevin! :-)

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Wordless Wednesday

**I realize I have been playing favorites lately...pics of Stella coming soon! ha! But doesn't that say "somebody pleeeeaase play ball with me"...heehee!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Old Yeller by Fred Gipson

**6th book so far this year. Not exactly keeping pace with last year...

We all know Old Yeller...I knew I was going to cry. But in the words of one of my students, "A good book will do that to you." And cry I did. Right in front of my students. One said, "It's ok. I watched the movie and I cried too!" I am on a roll with going back and reading some of my favorites and am loving it. I highly recommend it. These dog stories sure break me down in the end though! I think I may try Little Women next...that wasn't sad, was it? :-)

Monday, May 17, 2010

Garden so far

Once again we've gotten a late start on the garden but it is starting to come along nicely...look at these green beans I will soon be picking daily! The only thing about green beans is there is always a BUNCH!! Cucumbers and green beans can get out of control in a days time! I am most excited about our strawberry plant we got last weekend. And Big Bear got right on hanging it for me from the corner of the storage building. He's getting awfully handy! We've already picked and eaten several strawberries...yum!
And, this flimsy fence is so far keeping the pups out!! If it would keep the rabbits and squirrels out, it would be awesome but we all know that won't happen. But, we've got the BB gun ready for the squirrels...shhh!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

The good stuff...

Thursday was a down day, but Friday, Saturday and Sunday were all up days! Woot! First, it was awesome that all the rain that was supposed to ruin Friday's activities didn't show up. Thank you Mr. Rain! Field day at school was able to go on (my class came in 2nd place overall...there is NO beating Mrs. Wright! ha!) and Kevin was able to have a successful day of concessions! Saturday we felt sure the rain would come and were mentally prepared for a rain-out, but it held off again and we had our most successful concession day of this season. And.....drumroll.....I am pretty sure we have one more weekend in the borrowed concession trailer and then we are buying our own!!!! Woo-hoo!!
In cuteness news around here, Rex, our boxer pup is no longer a pup. He's a year old now!! We celebrated his birthday (yes, we celebrate furkids birthdays around here) on Thursday. But, his brother's mom thinks their birthday is the 21st. ha! Either way, we are in the right month and he got his birthday presents on Thursday and was happy! Look at his cuteness:
And then Stella promptly tried to steal his birthday toy. She just can't let him have anything!
But, look at that happy face....he got it back. At least for a little bit! Stella's birthday is next month and she'll get a present too. Because by then, this one will be destroyed! ha!
Last, but not least, Kevin had his first informal meeting tonight to start up Celebrate Recovery or some type of Bible Study support group for people who have struggled with addictions for our church. Please pray with us about this. Our pastor is very supportive of Kevin, and we feel that this is what God wants Kevin to do...this is why we went through what we did. And to be able to help others makes it all worth it!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Up and Down

That is the best description of my emotions lately. I think probably clomid or no clomid my emotions would be on a roller coaster. This baby journey is just reaching a point where it is taking a toil. And, let me start by saying, I am praying. This WILL NOT destroy my faith....I will rely on Jesus more, not less. Prayer is how I am surviving. But, I have discovered that when I can get through the day without talking about anything baby related or seeing a cute baby, then I am ok. I can almost put it all out of my mind. Now, keep in mind this is coming from a non-baby person. I have never been one of those people who sees someones baby and wants one. Nor have I ever gotten the urge to have one just because my best friend has a baby. I have never been a "baby person." Now, throw a 2 year old at me with some rolly polly legs and we are talking! ha! But seriously, to now go from not being a baby person to seeing one and crying. Ummmm....things are changing. And, it would seem to me that God is making the desire stronger rather than weaker. Right? I don't know. I seem to know nothing these days. I am just getting from day to day and trying to let this all go to God. Every morning I am praying for Him to take this from me. Take the worry and the doubt. I am praying for Him to show me how to give it all to him. Show me how to surrender it. I want to. Desperately. And, just when I think I am making progress. Something will happen and I am a crying mess. Let me give you an example of how insensitive some people can be. Here is an actual conversation between me and a neighbor and keep in mind each of us were standing in our driveways so it is being yelled across the front yard. Neighbor: "Hey Lori! You pregnant yet?" Me: "Not yet." Neighbor: "Well what's wrong with you?" Seriously? I wish I knew what the hold up was...but I am not going to yell it across the yard to you! The conversation didn't end there...I did walk a little closer to keep all the neighbors from hearing our business (like it matters since I blast it all over the internet! ha). Sadly, she isn't the first person to ask "well, what's wrong with you?" Jeez...I hope she's the last though. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know if anything is wrong with me. But I think about it enough without someone asking me.
I am just having a 'down day' with the baby stuff...and we even took this month 'off' due to all the stress from it that was causing us to fight. I don't want our marriage to suffer because of this. So, we took a break from it. I just wish I could escape it daily. I wish I could go somewhere - just me and Kevin and relax and escape the world.

Keep the prayers coming and thanks for listening to me get it out of my system yet again!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Aww...thanks!

One of my parents walked in this morning with these roses from her flowerbed for me! What a great start to the day! Parents, you have no idea how much it means to us teachers when we get a thank you from a parent. It can be as simple as an email and it makes all the difference because too often all we get are complaints. I know there are exceptions to this but we love your kids too and want them to succeed. Aren't they gorgeous? :-)

Monday, May 10, 2010

Meatzilla

That is what Kevin has named his "new" ride...meatzilla. And, I am not as fond of Meatzilla as he is but I totally admit that it has been good for him. He actually works on it and has been tinkering around with it and learning mechanics. That's not his expertise...he is a chef. My dad is a mechanic. But Kevin has taken the door off and fixed the window. Impressive! And today, he changed the headlight. And, he loves it! We also got a thing to jump start Meatzilla without another car. She doesn't always start, but that doesn't stop him from loving her. Apparently the kids at the skeet shooting were admiring her the other day. They think Meatzilla is cool. They don't make trucks like this anymore. Nope, they don't ... she's over 20 years old! LOL! But ladies, you should hear her engine roar! It doesn't just purr...it roars! Oh, and she guzzles the gas...gets about 3 feet to the gallon! But Kevin still loves her. It's a man thing for sure! :-)

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Curve balls...

Sometimes you don't even see them coming. Then, they hit you out of nowhere. Those are the worst. It's 9:45 am on Sunday, and I should be in Sunday School...why aren't I? Well, here is how my Mother's Day started. Kevin got up to go help with the Mother's Day breakfast at church. They started serving at 9:15 am. Sunday School usually starts at 9:30 am. So, I asked how it was going to work....did that mean no Sunday School? No one really knew...so I walk into a Sunday School full of men. I am the only woman. All the other women are mom's. They are at the mom's day breakfast. Kevin tries to get me to go eat breakfast anyway. I walk in there with all those mom's and know I am about to lose it. Everything in me is screaming "get out of here!". Let's face it, I'm not a mom. It's a nice thought to say "you are a mom to your pets and the kids at school". But that isn't the same thing. I am not a mom. I may not get to be a mom. So, I ran. I held it together until I got the car and then I cried, and I cried on the drive home. I've been doing so good this week and then slam! Hit smack in the face with it. So, that's my morning...but I'm going to work on this messy house and go to regular church in an hour. Then, I'm going to celebrate MY MOM. The bestest in the world!

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Bad Doggie!

See this face? This is the face of a bad, bad puppy!

Keeping in mind that Mr. Rex came to us from BoxAR rescue because he had been at the pound numerous times already as a 5 month old. Apparently, he learned his escaping ways from his daddy. So daddy and pups would climb over fences and hit the streets. So far, he hasn't tried to jump or get out of the privacy fence. But we CANNOT keep him in a chain link pen at my Mom's. He just go right over it - all 6 feet of it!

Well, this week he decided he had been good for too long and it was time to hit the streets. Hey - maybe he'd run into his long lost brother? Kevin was bringing something in from the garage and Rex slipped past him into the garage. No biggie except the garage door was up. That is a recipe for disaster with this dog. He is unpredictable. Sometimes he will come when you call him and others not so much. This time, he decided he was FREE! Once he ran past me close enough for me to reach out to catch him and miss. Then, with both of us calling him, he took off on a dead run down the road. DEAD RUN...that dog has some serious speed. And, I swear I heard him laughing at us. "Suckers! Catch me if you can!" Long story short, we split up, one on foot, one in the car, and he came back to me within 5 minutes. URGH! He had his run of freedom and somehow, I doubt it is his last. This dog is T.R.O.U.B.L.E. And people said the lab would be the bad one. LOL!

Monday, May 3, 2010

I can't think of a catchy title....

I don't want to jinx anything...but I think I am back to normal. So, that is good news. I will only be a raging hormonal lunatic 5 days each month while on the medicine. ha! Yay for Kevin sake!!
Lots of good stuff happening this week...too much to be in a funky mood. :)
~I have to give a shout out to my school. I am super blessed to be working at a school that has a group of teachers that wants to do Bible studies together. We are starting a Psalms a week each week from now until school is out. Woot!
~Kevin has 3 caterings and two full days of concessions this week! Hello baby and concession trailer $$! LOL!
~Thursday night is our last night of our prayer Bible study we've been doing and Kevin is giving his testimony. There will be some people invited to this last study meeting that are struggling with alcohol. So, pray for Kevin to have the words they need to hear.
~AND, in the bestest news....we are going to Florida this summer (as a tag along with Kevin's family vacation)...and his sister made the condo reservations today. Hello one FULL week on the beach. I can hardly wait!!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Little Better....

Thanks for the continued emails and prayers everyone! I am feeling a little normal again. And trying to watch my mood swings for my husbands benefit! :-) Friday was BAD...I pretty much was a mean teacher all day that my students must have thought had been possessed by something, and I just tried to make it until 2:30 so I could go home and curl up in a ball and have a good cry. BUT, instead, I made a pact with a girlfriend also having a bad day that neither of us would cry! HA! And we didn't! Scrapbook night on Friday night was just what the doctor ordered!! I was able to have my mood swings all in good fun and found my laughter! Yay!! We survived the tornado's ripping through the state too. And, then Saturday we thought we'd get stormed out of our concessions but the rain held off until that night.
Now, we are just gearing up for a super busy week of caterings and concessions...and trying to keep positive thoughts. Even with the first of our infertility bills coming in the mail....while we try to find the money for a concessions trailer at the same time! AHHHHHHH!!!!!! Is it the clomid or the stress causing my mood swings? LOL!