Thursday, September 19, 2013

Battle Scars

You know those scars left behind from the "battles" you've faced in life.  The ones that made you into who you are.  The scars that are still visible because the cut was so deep.  I have felt one of those scars a few times lately.  Don't get me wrong.  I am FINALLY on the "other side" of infertility.  Whatever that is - the other side.  I just know I am not depressed anymore and feel like life has resumed to a normal state.  But there are times, when it sneaks up and makes my heart hurt.  Times like holding a kindergartners hand to help them walk down the hall quietly.  That little hand in mine quietly breaks my heart just a little.  Times like at Awana when one of the girls hands me their vest and asks me to put their pins on for them.  A total mom job that I am blessed to be able to do, but it quietly breaks my heart just a little.  I think it is a hurt I will always carry.  One I will never fully understand.  But, I know God has a reason and I trust in that.  I just never expected working with the younger kids to be a little bittersweet.


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