I'm already bawling and I know I'm going to cry all the way through this. I miss her every single day. There hasn't been a day in the past two weeks that I haven't looked for her only to realize she's not with us anymore. Over 17 years we had together and I guess I never realized just how much of my daily routine included taking care of her and loving on her. She was definitely loved and I know she knew it. Sometimes I would go and look for her just to kiss her on top of the head and tell her. I lost count of how many times I told her on that last day. When you have an elderly pet, you know your days are limited, and I didn't take them for granted, but yet, I selfishly wish she were still here.
She raised FIVE puppies in her 17 years!! She was a year old when Jax and Rocky entered the picture. And, then raised Rex and Stella. Poor Rex, she bullied him. She knew he was weak and would trap him in rooms or corner him and when we heard him crying, we would go help him! LOL! Bubba Bear was too much for her. She was just about too old to deal with him. Of course, I think we all are! But, she tolerated them all. She had the softest spot for my precious Jax though.
So many things about my beautiful girl that I don't want to forget...how she only drank water from the bathroom tap and let it drip on top of her head and run down...how she would lead me down the hall all the way to her food bowl or to be let up on the sink, stopping to look up and make sure I was still following...her ears and feet (like the grinch with all that hair coming out. Oh, how I loved her paws!)...and her purr....I miss her purr every night as we would fall asleep...
...she was clumsy for a cat...so clumsy!...she once tried to walk along the fence and fell over to the other side (scary for Momma)...she was a princess and rarely went outside and when she did, she mainly stayed on the deck with me & laid under the lounger while I read...but in her later years, she started wanting out for just a few minutes each morning & she would sit and stare at the back door just willing it to open...
...she loved to lay on me when I was reading and loved our new blanket this winter...she fell asleep snuggled in my arms each night and would sleep there or at my feet...so each morning taking care of her was the first thing I did...we got up together and she came into the bathroom while I got ready for work...
...she didn't care that the dogs were bigger than her. She would come into the room where they were and sit right in the middle of the floor and dare them to disturb her. They didn't....
Mostly, I miss her fluff...her fluff and her purr and those eyes. I just miss her every single day and I don't want to forget. I want to always remember how soft she was and how she loved to sit in my lap when I was on the computer or scrapbooking or reading. She loved her momma just as much as I loved her.
It was so hard to watch her that last week and half. We pretty much gave her whatever she wanted. Several times a day, she wanted to just go outside and sit by the pond. I would go outside with her and just soak it up because I knew our time was coming to an end. You can't really tell how skinny she got at the end because of her gorgeous fluff and for that I am glad. Did you know she had her own song that I sang to her? "Could her be, the most beautiful cat in the world? Yes, her be."
I have peace in that she died at home in my arms and not at the vet. She spent her last day getting to go out by pond, getting brushed, being told multiple times how much she was loved, and I held her in my lap for her final hours and I never stopped petting her. I pet her, I sang to her, I loved her and let her know it was ok.
I love you Nanna Girl and I hope you & Simba & Rocky & Jax are all having a big time!
*diagnosed with diabetes in October 2011
*diagnosed with kidney failure in June 2012
She was one tough cookie all the way until the end! :)
October 1996 - February 3, 2014
Most loved cat in the world